TAMPA – After the wrap up of the Republican National Convention this week, VP pick Paul Ryan said that “when Romney is elected, I will propose a nationwide ban on fact checking”.
After being accused of fabricating many details in his speech earlier this week, Ryan held a press conference today. “What is a lie but an abstract truth?” he said. “If you support our ticket, the best percentage of truth you will get is 20% tops. And I would like to clarify that some of my words, including various articles and nouns, were used factually. To say that I deceived the American public with half-truths and unsubstantiated claims – well, what did you expect from the GOP?”
Many supporters of the Romney/Ryan campaign weighed in with their thoughts. “Manipulating language and making outrageous claims is our God-given right, not to mention our Constitutional right,” said chairman Reince Priebus, “under laws we intend to propose when we win the presidency.”
Ryan continued the discussion of his plan for banning fact-checking by also requesting that new legislation be passed that would prevent children from exceeding a third grade reading level, in accordance with “guidelines already used by members of the GOP”.
In related news, the furniture for the set of “Fox & Friends” will be replaced with the Fox News writers who disputed Ryan’s convention speech…