Rick Perry Admonishes Wendy Davis for Not Being a Man
AUSTIN – Rick Perry held a conference this morning, discussing Sen. Wendy Davis (TX) and her breakthrough filibuster of an abortion bill Wednesday.
“Clearly she is not thinking about what the impact of her beliefs would have on the men in Texas, and that is probably because she has made the mistake of not being a male politician,” said Perry.
“When it comes to women’s rights, what little I think of them should not be opposed – people voted for me for a reason. I am Governor of this great state because Texans want solid leadership, a voice for issues, and — um, oh man, not again!”
Many women have blasted the Governor for his disregard of their rights, among other things. “I think Mr. Perry has a specific agenda in mind,” said Ms. Davis. ”But unfortunately it has nothing to do with something I like to call ‘reality’”.
Perry fired off a response to claims that he doesn’t understand or even appreciate women. ”I have been around women all my life,” said Perry. ”I’m almost certain that I was born because of one. But that would have to do with biology, and since I am putting together a bill against it, I can’t comment any further.”
Representatives for Perry said they wanted to assure his supporters that his plan to run again for President was still underway, “at least until his medication kicks in”.
In totally unrelated news, the Mars Rover Curiosity reported possible evidence of Edward Snowden’s whereabouts…