FAIRLY BREAKING: Christine O’Donnell Endorses Mitt Romney, Denies Putting Curses On Other Candidates

Tea Party favorite Christine O’Donnell announced her endorsement for Mitt Romney this week, stating “one of the things that I like about him is that he’s consistent since he changed his mind, and he’s humble enough to say ‘I don’t always have the right answers,’ because clearly he doesn’t have any.”

O’Donnell also wanted to put to rest any accusations that she was also planning to put curses on the other candidates. “I have already publicly denied that I am a witch, which seems to have been fine with the American people, the Tea Partiers, and my coven.”

Coincidentally, other GOP candidates have been experiencing rashes, loss of hair, and in some cases failure to communicate, since O’Donnell’s endorsement announcement. A representative for O’Donnell says that “she has no comment on the first two, but swears up and down that the third possible ‘curse’, is not a curse at all, but a standard for the GOP”.

In related news, Rick Perry was hospitalized recently when his foot inexplicably pulled his leg up and rammed itself into his mouth…

By clavius42

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