Texas Governor Rick Perry held a press conference today after being indicted by a grand jury in Texas on two counts of abuse of power and coercion over a funding veto he made last year that was seen as being intended to force a local prosecutor to resign.
“The person in question is part of an integrity unit,” said Perry. “If you guys know anything about me, it’s that I could care less about integrity.”
“I deny any wrongdoing, as what I did I did for Texas. If you don’t believe me, just ask me.”
The Public Integrity Unit overseen by the prosecutor investigates wrongdoing by public officials statewide.
“So you can appreciate the irony,” said Travis County District Attorney Rosemary Lehmberg.
“I am not guilty of these charges, I would also like to deny that my veto had anything to do with anything else that the unit would have discovered that I did for the great state of Texas (of course). If you just ask me, I will tell you what you need to know, or least what I think you need to know.”
Perry also maintains that though he will not be seeking re-election as governor, he will be campaigning for president in 2015.
“Let’s face it, this wouldn’t be the first time a crook would be elected, and the last one was also from Texas!”
“I cannot in good conscience support a person charged with ultimate responsibility that has lost the public’s confidence,” Perry added.
“I’m talking about Lehmberg, not me. Really.”